you busted

California Penal Code 211 - (Robbery in progress)

On March 17, 2009 at 1600 hours, a suspect robbed a 'nummy num' jar at local pantry. Thanks to an anonymous canine tip, a description of the suspect was provided: a caucasian female described as 2'6" 22lbs wearing a baggy diaper and no socks. The suspect was yelling incomprehensible language, and alerted the police as to its whereabouts with its sheer volume. After a quick confrontation, the suspect was apprehended. Witnesses say the suspect was said to be seen leaving the scene laughing.

Home officers arrived on the scene and conducted a thorough investigation of the room. Forensic analysis identified the remains of what appeared to be traces of cocoa, sugar and dried fruit. The suspect EKH was sequestered for violation of California Penal Codes 211 (Robbery), 594 (mischief) and 647b (pubic intoxiaction).

The documentation below will be submitted for court hearings, pending interrogation.

Exhibit A: The suspect (front)

Exhibit A: The suspect (profile)

Exhibit B: The crime scene


Exhibit C: The victim - Chocolate Covered Raisins (deceased)

Exhibit D: The accomplice - Pat "Baby Face" Robertson


The Sentence:

Extra long bath, and education lessons on Moral Decency

Oh, and the final charge? Running While In-Chocolated :) Seriously, folks. Does this look like the face of a guilty criminal? I see a repeat offender in our future.